Starred review from May 15, 2020
Grades 5-8 *Starred Review* Rowan is used to keeping secrets, but he also feels the need to talk to someone. Without anyone to listen, Rowan resorts to an unconventional coping mechanism: writing letters?each signed with a different name he is trying out at that point in time?and releasing them into the sky, tied to balloons. For example, "I hope that you find this letter, and that you'll read it and won't throw it away. I have some things to tell you. I hope that's okay. I've been just feeling kind of alone." As Rowan's past and present experiences are revealed, readers discover that things are even worse than they first appear; it's not just bullying at school, or misgendering by peers, but also psychological and sexual abuse at home. In time Rowan begins to realize that maybe he doesn't need to send his secrets into a void, but can instead begin to depend on a friend at school. This heartfelt, emotionally raw narrative delicately and respectfully covers incredibly complex issues (homophobia, substance abuse, sexual abuse, racism) that many young people around the world face, compounded by Rowan's status as a trans boy. Bean's debut novel for young readers is as difficult as it is hopeful, beautifully captured through a 10-year-old voice. A remarkable and memorable book!(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2020, American Library Association.)
May 22, 2020
Gr 5 Up-A tender story told in letters written by 10-year-old Rowan, who sets them afloat with 25-cent balloons he buys with his allowance. Rowan knows who he is; he knows what he likes and what he dislikes, but he can't seem to convince his parents that nothing is wrong with him. His mother and father still call him the name he doesn't like, and at night his dad hurts him while Rowan's mother ignores it all. When his parents start taking him to see a therapist, Rowan begins to question whether or not he really is sick. A young trans boy, Rowan is finding himself in a world where fitting in feels wrong and seeking friendship seems impossible. Queer and trans author Bean brings tremendous sensitivity to the tale of a young child exploring their identity and experiencing abuse. Initially, Rowan's voice reads slightly more mature than a typical ten-year-old, but this narrative elevation is balanced with Rowan's fears and interactions with classmates as his letters become more relatable and heartbreaking. Bean provides a beautiful story for any child experiencing uncertainty. And for those who cannot relate, Rowan's story creates an avenue for understanding and empathy. VERDICT This middle grade debut is a strong addition to any library collection; it will spark needed conversations among children and adults alike, aiding the journey toward a more compassionate and open community.-Rachel Lipkin, Brooklyn P.L.
Copyright 2020 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.
Starred review from April 15, 2020
A 10-year-old transgender boy sends letters via balloon, hoping someone out there will read them. It's 1997, and Rowan is starting fifth grade. He knows he's a boy, but no one else understands. He called a girl "cute" during truth or dare, and now he's a social pariah. His dad comes into his room at night, but he's not ready to talk about that yet. He's sorry for being weird. Bean vividly and sensitively captures the struggle of being a child who just can't fit in and doesn't understand why. It is an authentic portrayal of childhood pain without an ounce of condescension. Over the course of the school year, Rowan, who is presumed to be white, and his new best friend Sofie, who appears to be black, struggle to make sense of what is right and wrong, good and bad in their working-class Michigan world. While the book tackles big issues, primarily addressing being trans and queer and surviving incest as well as touching on parental incarceration, anyone who has ever been a sad or confused child will be able to see a little bit of themselves in Rowan and Sofie. And if the author leans a bit heavily on the unnecessary crutch of '90s references, at least it increases the book's appeal for both young retro-enthusiasts and nostalgic adults--and this is one of those rare middle-grade books with real adult appeal. Everyone should read this remarkable, affecting novel. (author's note, resources, acknowledgements) (Historical fiction. 10-14, adult)
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